A Nice Pear

Here's another watercolor from my collection. I painted this while I was rehabbing with Danny Bonaduce back in the 80's. Danny's paintings (we had the same art therapy class) were all of dead birds strewn around the canvas. Very creepy. Danny had some issues. Most of my paintings were of fruit.

You can click on the image to get a better look.

What Is The Dealio?

If there is one thing I cannot abide, it is people who waste your time. I call them "time wasters," sometimes right to their face. Take for example this cartoonist fellow, Pigbert or Dirtbutt or whatever the h-e-double hockey sticks his fuckin' name is. He was supposed to stop by the house and interview yours truly for that fabulous new website, Food for Thought: A News Café, but I get an email late yesterday saying that he's "super busy" with his write-in campaign for City Council and doesn't "have time for our interview."

Harumph.

Does he believe that he's the only super-busy person in the world? Is he so self-centered as to believe his is the only write-in campaign for City Council? Arrogant prick.

I used to know a lot of people like him when I lived and worked in Hollywood. Agents, producers and the like, always "super-busy" with no time to look at my glossies. Well, where are those assholes now, I ask you? Living in Topanga Canyon bungalows with a Prius in the driveway? Well, sure, probably. I would imagine they parlayed all that super busyness into big bucks.

Sure. Movers and shakers. They make stuff happen. Sometimes they make stuff happen for people who don't deserve it. Look at Howie Mandel. Jesus, I mean Howie Mandel has a billboard on The Strip, for Christ's sake! Howie Fucking Mandel! Still blowin' up that goddamned rubber glove on his bald head and cashing those fat network checks.

God, shoot me now.

So, to have Limpdick The Cartoonist blow me off for some imaginary election has brought me really, really close to doing a Judy. I have a medicine chest full of pills and salves and I may just swallow a bottle of Cialus and just let rigor mortis set in. But, I gotta keep a stiff upper lip...so I'll just grind the Cialus into an ointment and apply directly. OMG, do you hear how I'm talking?!? How could I let a puny incident like this upset me so? Besides, who would feed Twinkles IV?

I'll be damned if I let those bastards at Haven Humane near my little princess... or my dog either!

Oh well, I see there's another email from Dildobert, maybe this interview will take place after all. If it does, you'll just have to forgive me for being such a DQ.

That's it! TTFN,

Harry Ames, Jr.

oooh! Exciting News!!!

Well, slap my ass and call me Betty! I just heard that I was going to be interviewed for the hottest new website in Cybertown! That's right! I've agreed to be interviewed for Food For Thought, A News Cafe!
There's only one drawback, in fact, I almost said no to the offer because it's not going to be Kelly Brewer, Doni Greenberg or Jim Dyar doing the interview. They're sending some clown, whatshisface, the cartoon guy (I'm sorry, I haven't found even one of his so called "comics" very comical) to come by my house to do the interview. A cartoonist? Good Lord, things must be tight over at FFT. Oh well, they're new so I'll cut them some slack. Still, it's such exciting news, isn't it? I wonder how much they're going to pay me. Daddy needs new shoes. Anyway, I'll keep you posted!

TTFN,
Harry